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October 06, 2006

Bugger The Press

When it comes to covering their ass, it’s hard to find a group more entertaining than the great American Right. You can catch them in the most hypocritical of illicit actions and establish a trail of contradictions and cover-ups so distinct that even Ray Charles could follow it without a cane, and these guys are going to endlessly blame it all on the Democrats and the media.

Case in point: everybody’s favorite wrestling coach, Speaker of the House Denny “Mad Cow” Hastert. Accused by fellow Republicans of covering up the Foley Follies, he stood his ground against demands from the Right for his resignation. His response? We’re going to bust us the press and some Democrats.

If you think I’m kidding, here’s the entire exchange between a reporter and Mad Cow during Wednesday’s press conference:

REPORTER: Can we get the record straight on a couple of things. Tell us when you learned that there was more than a minor problem that this was truly something that had a predatory feel to it. And secondly, after you’ve answered that question, if you really did only learn a week or so ago, were you not let down by staff members who seem to have known much more and shouldn’t some of them have come from your own staff if not you personally?

HASTERT: I, first of all, learned of this last Friday, when we were about to leave Congress for, you know, the break to go out and campaign. And that’s the first time I heard of the explicit language. When it happened, Republicans acted and the guy’s gone. But the fact is, I don’t know who knew what, when.

We know there are reports of people that knew it and kind of fed it out or leaked it to the press. That’s why we’ve asked for investigation. So, let me just say, that’s why we’ve asked for an investigation – to find who that is. If it’s members of my staff, or they didn’t do the job, we will act appropriately. If it’s somebody else’s staff, they ought to act appropriately as well.

Excuse me, Representative Mad Cow? Who is it you’re investigating? Ex-Rep. Foley, who quit Congress and now, for some absurd reason, is in rehab? You know, the one who hit on those teenagers? Or the press who outed him? Or the Democrats who, as far as I can tell, are far less effective at playing these political games than your people have been?

Oh, and by the way. You said that you hadn’t heard of the explicit language until last Friday. O.K. Fine. But when did you hear about Foley’s chasing pages?

Whoever leaked this stuff out should get a medal, probably from the congressman who sponsored that recent legislation that was supposed to prevent this sort of thing.

Except that guy’s in rehab right now.

Posted by Mike Gold at October 6, 2006 03:02 PM

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Comments

The truth will eventually come out: It's all Bill Clinton's fault. He used his evil powers to build a time machine to go back in time, where he paid a clergyman to molest Mark Foley, thereby turning him into a homosexual who would someday want to have sex with strapping young male pages.

I'm still trying to figure out how he tricked the good and righteous Denny Hastert into trying to cover it up. Probably some kind of evil potion or something.

Posted by: Rick Oliver at October 6, 2006 05:54 PM

"When it comes to covering their ass, it’s hard to find a group more entertaining than the great American Right. You can catch them in the most hypocritical of illicit actions and establish a trail of contradictions and cover-ups so distinct that even Ray Charles could follow it without a cane, and these guys are going to endlessly blame it all on the Democrats and the media."

You left wing idiots have such short memories its a wonder you can even remember that you even have a blog, much less contribute to it.

Whatever happened to the "Politics of Personal Destruction"? Remember December 18, 1998? When lil' Billy Clinton, Gephart, and *snif* Bonior, begged the country to 'stop picking on us!!!' Waaaahhh!!! Wahhhhhh!!

GEPHARDT: We must turn away now from the politics of personal destruction and return to a politics of values. The American people deserve better.

Gold:Case in point: everybody’s favorite wrestling coach, Speaker of the House Denny “Mad Cow” Hastert

Who's the fucking hippocryte now?


Posted by: Ben Bradley at October 6, 2006 06:39 PM

Yes, Ben, it's always all about Bill Clinton, isn't it?

Personally, I have no love for Clinton. Like Foley, he couldn't keep his dick in his pants. Unlike Foley, he was not a member of the party that got in bed with the Evangelical Christians and made noises about "the party of values" and constitutional amendments banning gay marriage.

After you learn to spell "hypocrite," look up a definition of "irony." (If you're going to insult someone, at least spell the insult correctly. You weren't even "fucking" close.)

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